fun facts about the world

Hey y’all!

I’ve been distracted by football and alcohol recently and I haven’t been able to post as much as I wanted. If you want to buy me a laptop and fast Internet, I would be able to post more frequently. If you want to steal those things and give them to me, thats cool too. As A Buddhist, I feel as though all property is transitive anyway. Just don’t go repeating that line to the cops.

Anyway, in between training for the 2010 Olympics and teaching kids to read, I found some time today to check my email. Actually, checking my email was part of one of a lesson I employ while teaching kids to read, entitled "reading: there is shit to read on the computer" aka lesson number 21. It could be said that I’m burning herb way ahead of the learning curve. Anyway, after reading my email aloud to Johnny and Ali Ali Oner, they raised some interesting questions about email, the job description of a councilman and why sex is constantly confused for love. They are some smart little motherfucks, that Johnny and Ali Ali Oner.

Here is the actual email I received from Eric "E-Guns" Gioia, who is actually my Councilman. I even voted for him after/because he broke campaign law by handing out material directly outside of the polling station and shaking my hand, a fact that I could have used to get him thrown off the ballot. In retrospect, if I had more time it would have been pretty funny to have done that. I digress.

Don’t forget to join us at Latitude, just a block from Times Square, TOMORROW NIGHT at 7PM for the 1^st Annual Halloween Party with Eric Gioia!

You don’t need a costume, but dress as festive as you want!   All the details for the event are below:

To give everyone a real opportunity to get involved, we’re asking people to give whatever they can — even if it’s only $10.  Please spread the word to friends, family, and co-workers, and if you are planning to attend, please click on the invite above to RSVP and buy your tickets online, so you don’t get stuck waiting at the door.  You can also RSVP at http://www.ericgioia.com/, at 718.426.5012, or by emailing us at teamgioia@ericgioia.com.

Thanks again for all your support, and we look forward to seeing you at Latitude (8^th Ave. between 47^th & 48^th St.), TOMORROW NIGHT ^{at 7pm!}

Team Gioia

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So after reading the email aloud to the aforementioned Johnny and Ali Ali Oner, I asked them to respond and react to the contents of said email. Below is as close to a transcript of our conversation as I could muster. These conversations don’t transcribe themselves, you know.

Johnny: Why is the Halloween party a week before Halloween?

Me: I don’t know.

Johnny: Are you going to dress up?

Me: I’m not going to this wack shit. Besides, I’m a bit old to dress up.

Ali Ali Oner: My brother is your age and he dresses up.

Me: Your brother is probably a fucking herb.

Johnny and Ali Ali Oner: Oooooooooh.

Me: Sorry. Is there anything else you want to ask me about the email?

Johnny: If Eric Gioia is a councilman in Queens, why is he having this party in Manhattan?

Ali Ali Oner: Yeah!

Me: I don’t know. All I know about Eric Gioia is that if he keeps sending me these unsolicited emails I may file a restraining order against him.

Ali Ali Oner: You should be a councilman.

Me: One day, Ali Ali Oner……One day.

At this point me, Johnny and Ali Ali Oner broke into a spontaneous rendition of "Oooh Child" as red, white and blue balloons fell from the ceiling. Off camera, Eric Gioia was regretting the day he got me angry and lamenting his inevitable defeat when I run against him. Because I always said, if you can’t run up on ‘em, you can always run against them.

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This entry was posted on Monday, October 23rd, 2006 at 2:03 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.