Men Should Act Like Men
So, you know, in between leaping tall buildings in a single bound and being a multi-platinum R&B singer I occasionally find time to watch television.
There is this one series of commercials for "Milwalkee’s Best Light" (which I guess people in rural areas and frat-tastic dudes refer to as "beast light" -ahh the word play of idiots) wherein a group of dudes will be standing around doing something like playing poker. Then, when one of them commits a faux pas, like leaving the table to call their girlfriend, a giant can of Milwalkee’s Best Light falls out of the sky and lands on them, presumably killing them on the spot.
While I’m surely not trying to sanction any behavior that would fall under the category of Fruitcake Shit (no offense) I do think that these commercials are pretty ridiculous in terms of ascribing old-fashioned gender roles to dudes. I mean, in one of the spots a guy is seen doing "baby talk" to a small dog. Then a large can of Milwalkees Best Light falls from the heavens above and lands on him, presumanbly killing him. The voiceover than informs us that "Men should act like men, AND light beer should taste like beer." Are we to believe that if the unwitting animal-loving male had been more "masculine" he would have kicked the dog in the face, thuis avoiding his aluminum death? I’m just a little unclear on this. Are you asking me to go kill dogs, or what?
And also, c’mon Milwalkees Best Light. Your beer tastes like watered down water. If I was running their ad campaign I would have come up with something a little more accurate to market the product. Such as:
"Milwalkees Best Light: If Coors has too much flavor."
"Milwalkees Best Light: Free 6-pack if you know what state Milwakee is in."
"Milwalkees Best Light: Drink it right out of the can."
"Millwalkees Best Light: Mets fans have herpes."
Whereas their current ad campaign can be summed up as: "Miwalkeees Best Light, if you do anything the brewers consider to be effeminate, it will fall from the sky and kill you on the spot." Shit, I imagine a generation of beer drinkers who are so busy looking up that they hardly even have time to get drunk anymore.
What this your intention, Miller Brewing Company? I think not.
