You and I = US
After all of that joy I caused earlier in the week with my incredible word games, I figured we could play "which one of these doesn’t belong here".
Example: Cat, dog, horse, blue.
The answer would be (implied) D, "blue". Because cats, dogs (back when I was a serious alcoholic and I used to speak with a Scottish accent, I would walk around all sauced up muttering "I dunna like dugs") and horses are all animals whereas blue is a color and occasionally a feeling. You see?
OK, here we go.
United States, China, Iran, Saudi Arabia.
If you said "United States" -you won!
It seems as though the tree-hugging, organic granola eating, Birkenstock wearing, Gregorian Chant listening-to pussies over at Amnesty International (they make the BEST pancakes) have stood up from their drum circle long enough to release a report condemning the aforementioned countries for executing the most people in the fiscal year of 2005. China, it should be noted, took home the Gold, whereas the United States finished just out of medal contention.
From Yahoo!
"In its annual report on executions, the rights group said about 1,770 executions were reported to have been carried out in China in 2005…at least 94 people were executed in Iran, 86 in Saudi Arabia and 60 in the United States."
Some people may "accentuate the positive" and say, after the debacle in the World Baseball Classic, it’s nice to be among the international leaders in any sport, however others would insist that by the time the tie-dyed vegans over at Amnesty International put down their knitting long enough to release the Humans Rights Report for next year we should be waaaaaay ahead of China in total people executed.
Others would claim that, by relating to the enemy on such a hot-button issue we are actually moving closer to peace. I don’t have any personal problems with people in China, Iran or Saudi Arabia -therefore I don’t see any reason why they should be executed. Shit, in Iran they killed this kid a few years back for possession of alcohol. Not underage possession either, mind you. Shit is bugged!
I was wondering, what with our holier than thou stance on human rights issues in lesser countries whose names I won’t bother speaking (I don’t want Afghanistan’s Ambassador to send me another "keep our name out ya mouth" emails) how we can justify executing anyone. Does the United States really want to be mentioned in the same breath as Iran when it comes to human rights?
I’m aware of the whole "prison industrial complex" and how sending people to jail helps the economy, in the sense that tax breaks for the rich help the economy -but isn’t killing a man by giving him a lethal injection depriving him of his civil rights? Speaking strictly in terms of cost-effectiveness, executions make more sense than keeping someone in a jail (which is basically an expensive summer camp paid for by the taxpayers) until they die of natural causes. Personally, I think we should restructure the whole system. I mean, do you really want a state-sponsored "hot dose" pumped into your veins after being found guilty by 12 retards who would rather be home watching "Supermarket Sweep" (which is an amazing show)?
Unfortunately, at press time I don’t have a solution for this problem.
On one hand, I see people everyday that I think should be executed. You may recall a few years back I proposed that the influx of transplants in NYC could be slowed seriously if 1 in every 5 people seeking to relocate here was shot in the head and killed. We could probably even turn a profit harvesting their organs (which some people claim is China’s motivation for all these executions) and selling them to hospitals. Take that Connecticut!
On the other hand, since Church and State have basically been Siamese Twins these past 5 1/2 years, shouldn’t the phrase "turn the other cheek" actually mean something?
It’s very confusing.
Me, I still dunna like dugs.
