fun facts about the world

Dear Sirs,

It’s another one of those "thank God I’m literate" moments, as this is an official blog update from your boy man young adult ROX ONE.

I haven’t been up to much, just watching the World Baseball Classic and shooting this Chronikill video. As always, I’ve been using alcohol and marijuana in large quantities to make the intolerable seem merely mundane.

Here are some exciting links, and I’ll be talking some more shit at the end of the post. That said, don’t waste too much energy reading what other people wrote. They are the unlimited bread-sticks and salad bar and I am the entree in this, the Olive Garden of life.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-8260059923762628848&q=%22loose+change%22 -some (really long) video which proves the Bush Administration planned 9/11 or whatever. At this point does it even matter? I mean, if you kill a dozen people, cheating on your wife kinda becomes irrelevant. < That’s a college level analogy right there thurr.

Also to consider, isn’t loose change what Jadakiss calls 50 Cent? Hmmmmmm.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060315/ap_on_re_mi_ea/saddam_trial_13;_ylt=AixyU6g.eJqoF54mAW.ICAFX6GMA;_ylu=X3oDMTBiMW04NW9mBHNlYwMlJVRPUCUl

Saddam Hussein claims he’s still the President of Iraq. Saddam also claims he likes you for your mind and not just your body. At this point, wouldn’t it be a win-win situation to just let him have the country back? After all things were going pretty smoothly there three years ago (also known as before the war), whereas since we invaded them it’s like there is a war going on. Compare and contrast, I also say.

Also to consider: "I’m an alcoholic and that’s ROX’s flaw/ My liver looks like Baghdad after "Shock and Awe"/ -I’m just saying.

http://www.nypost.com/gossip/pagesix/63103.htm

Saddam Hussein Adriana Lima claims she is still a virgin. I claim: "I’d dry hump you all night, if that’s what you’re into." Penetration = so 90’s.

http://www.nola.com/news/t-p/neworleans/index.ssf?/base/news-5/1142406498194440.xml

Could New Orleans be back to half its original population in 2008? I have no real idea. I sure would like to enjoy a Hand Grenade while strolling down Decatur Street though.

http://www.allhiphop.com/hiphopnews/?ID=5460

Lil Kim’s reality show is the highest-rated debut in BET history. Too bad that I proved the Nielsen ratings were complete bullshit earlier in the week/month.

Also, I heard a rumor that one of Lil Kim’s breast implants was leaking in jail. Pass it on.

http://www.slate.com/id/2138032/?nav=tap3

Hasidic hipsters are making reggae. I didn’t read the article but I imagine this is happening in Brooklyn. Where the fuck is that nurse with my cianide tablets?

Okay, back to original link free content. So people here probably know how I’m anti-talking to strangers and pro-being left the fuck alone, but I had some interesting run-ins with strangers in the last few days that I feel would be good to share.

-I’m in my local deli trying to pick an ice cream flavor out that both of my parents like (I decided upon Cherry Vanilla) when this mid-30’s looking white guy walks past me and says "choice, choices, choices." I give him a look as if if to say "you have correctly assessed the situation, however I do not wish to talk to you." He shakes his head and tells me, in an overly bitter voice: "you should fucking move to Russia, only one choice for everything."

I neglected to inform him that choice is conditional upon options and when there is only one option, by definition there is no choice involved. Also, I heard Russia was cold and I don’t like Vodka or the Kremlin. Is that still whats popping in that neck of the woods? If my ignorance wasn’t so amusing, it would probably make me cry. No homo.

On Saturday night, while waiting for the V train to take me downtown (note: the V train DOES NOT run on the weekends), this homeless looking lady runs up on me, throws her bags down and says "watch these while I get my wheelchair." So I’m standing there "seeing something" and as always, there is no one to "say something" to as i was there waiting to blow up. Anyway, the woman returns with her wheelchair and I give her 75 cents (I sure hope God saw that) and as she is thanking me, her wheelchair comes within inches of falling off the platform in front of the oncoming E train (because we all know now that the F wasn’t running) before I grabbed it.

The moral of the story is, even if you are homeless, you shouldn’t mock people with disabilities by parading around with a wheelchair you don’t need.

The Weekend At A Glance:

-St. Patrick’s Day = Irish drinking.

-NCAA Tournament = Sports drinking.

-Sunday Afternoon = Problematic drinking.

I would also like to point out to my amazing and loyal readers that if you want me to update my blog, you can just send me a message saying "update your blog" and I’ll do it, usually within an hour or two if I’m at work.

Really!

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 15th, 2006 at 12:55 pm and is filed under Words From Chronikill. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.