Urban Hunting
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Yeah. It’s your boy with the 2 for 5 nicks, the pre 9/11 kicks and the 100 shot clips back to drop some knowledge about the new craze sweeping urban areas throughout the United States, Urban Hunting.
Now it may or may not be true that I invented this game on my way home from work yesterday because some deuchebag tourist/hipster (why split hairs?) was standing in my way preventing me from passing him as I tried to run for the 7, but that is fairly irrelevant. I wanted these types of people dead well before yesterday. Hence the game.
To play you need these simple household items.
Camouflage
Alcohol
Automatic Weapons
Bullets
Good Lawyers (the cases don’t beat theyselves)
There are no official rules, but the general goal is to shoot and kill as many people in an Urban Area who don’t belong there as possible. The best part is that you decide who belongs where.
Don’t like seeing Asians in Harlem, buck em down!
French people in Chinatown, not no mo’!
Don’t like the cracker influx in Spanish Harlem, lick shots!
Think Williamsburg should look like Hiroshima? Make it!
A point system can be devised for getting extra points for hitting specific targets, for example I would love to brutally murder some fucking y’ats from Texas right about now, so it stands to reason i should get more points for them than say, Nebraskian people, for whom my hatred is still simmering and has not yet boiled over and spilled onto the stove top of random shootings.
Its very important to have lots of bullets and a team of lawyers. Get your plea right son!
I’ve been arguing for some time that with a bit of strategically placed crack and some late 80’s early 90’s style street shootings (where all the victims are innocent) the hipsters and tourists will pack their bags and go home. "I hear that" Boston, Philly, LA, Houston and Atlanta are all really great and viable places to live.
Or, if you are politically inclined, move to a swing state early and start drumming up grass roots support.
Commit suicide!
The possibilities are endless, and playgirl, there is life outside of NYC. Unless I get you in my sniper sights.
