fun facts about the world

Brady Quinn, whom I hate because he playes for the hated Notre Dame Fighting ‘Lobes* was recently drafted by the Cleveland Browns in the first round. While some "experts" predicted him as the 3 pick, in actuality he fell into the 20’s.

I have my own sinking suspicion as to why that is -and it isn’t his pathetic inability to either beat USC or win a bowl game. Nor does it have to do with his laughable first name (Brandy Anderson, where are you?!?!?!).

In an era where potential 1st round picks have their lives delved into and rumors and hearsay masquerade as fact these sort of pictures can be damning.

…..not that there is anything wrong with that.

In other news, I see you baby!!!!!

Have a great weekend and bet on Cingular Quay and Scat Daddy to win the Derby, and perhaps mix in some Pletcher entries into your boxed exotics -the guy is bound to win one of these days. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you do NOT have a gambling problem.

*- I credit myself for creating the term ‘lobe as derogatory way to reference Irish people. It’s short for "Michelobe." No disrespect Irish people.

As everyone who has ever spoken to me about politics knows, I have no use for Rudy Jewliani. His most recent ridiculous statements (which echo those made by our fearless leader during the run up to the 2004 election) about how there will be another terrorist attack if the Democrats win in 2008 really struck a nerve with me.

I mean, as far as terrorism on US soil goes (and sorry to be blunt here, but we are talking about Muslims Extremists here, so save me your Timothy McVeigh (sp?) comments -as if anyone was going to comment) I would say that you can either reach three conclusions about the present republican administration

a) they looked the other way on 9/11

b) they were too incompetent to prevent 9/11 even though it sure seemed to be preventable given all the "facts"

c) they planned 9/11 and then laughed all the way to the bank

Those aren’t such hot options to me -so I really don’t know how the democrats could do any worse unless the provide arms to a group of people who later wind up using them against us….oh wait, the republicans already did that.

Also, and this really concerns me. I’ve been hearing about all the support Jewlie has been getting from "americans" living abroad in "israel" and how these treasonous fucks are planning on flying here and voting for him. It was pointed out that as Mayor of NYC Jewlie was vocally pro-israel.. Why the fuck was the mayor of an american city pro-israel? I mean, it’s not like the Australian Prime Minister is pro-Green party -it has nothing to do with his responsibilities.

I’ve been vocal in my calls for not letting people who hold duel citizenship in America and israel vote because its blatantly obvious that our affiliation with israel has been nothing short of an embarrassing disaster (and, tantamount to supporting terrorism) since the inception of that cursed slice of land. I’ve also been vocal in calling for Jewlie to be shot and dragged through the streets of NY on the back of a police horse rode by  Abner Louima (is he "repaired" enough to ride a horse?). And I’m on record as wanting another beer.

I can’t really think clearly when I think about the ways in which things have gone wrong in our country over the past 6 years. And then when I start thinking about how that piece of shit jewlie ruined my city I really need to go outside and smoke a cigarette and sing "everythings gonna be alright" over and over again while getting a massage. And by massage I mean…I’ll let that one go..

here is the article. have a blessed day!!

http://news.aol.com/elections/president/story/_a/giuliani-defends-terror-attack-comments/20070425235809990001?ncid=NWS00010000000001

Note to Georgia: It’s 2006 2007.

AOL sez: "Each year, in spite of integration, the school’s white students had raised money for their own unofficial prom and black students did the same to throw their own separate party, an annual ritual that divided the southern Georgia peanut-farming county anew each spring."

Wow this shit is crazy -I thought peanut-farming communities went out with, you know, segregation.

http://news.aol.com/topnews/articles/_a/georgia-school-holds-first-integrated/20070423102809990002?ncid=NWS00010000000001

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/04/19/commentary.nugent/index.html?eref=rss_topstories

So i read this piece by gun-activist and general lunatic Ted "Chicken Mc" Nuggent where he kinda, sorta misses the whole point about rethinking gun control issues in America and instead provides some anecdotal evidence about a few incidents where someone with a gun (a hero) stopped  someone with a gun (a villan) from killing innocent people. And by stopped -I mean that they shot them. He then spews some misguided hyperbole about how gun-free zones are actually crippling our society -but fails to point out that this is only because people who don’t really need guns have them in the first place.

While your average Repbulican would see no problem with this argument (guns save lives!) the inherent logic behind it seems a little flawed to me. My understanding is that if we limit the sale of guns to people who really NEED them -there would be less incidents where the INITIAL shooting occurs. For example if the Virgina Tech shooter was instead the Virginia Tech stabber -the amount of damage he could have done would be severly limited. Because he couldn’t just walk into a gun store (or Wal-Mart) show his drivers liscence and walk out with a pistol.

Personally I think if the police have guns, citizens should be able to have guns. I find it ridiculous that in Virginia a "permenant resident" can legally obtain a pistol -whereas in NYC I have a snowballs chance in hell at purchasing one (note -permenant residents can also possess guns legally in NYC-our gun policy is just learning diabled). I know all these thoughts are convoluted and not well thought out (im at work, dammit!). But consider them if/when you happen to discuss this issue in the aftermath of the VTech shooting.

I for one don’t see this story going away any time soon.

Ayo.. here is some assorted shit from the internet that I found either amusing, informative, worthwhile, worthless, offensive or hilarious. Since we are different people, you and I -that is, you may have different reactions. Feel free to holler at me in the comment section, although I realize that when you only post like ten times a year people stop checking for you. My bad! I was drunk!

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=boyd/070416&lpos=spotlight&lid=tab3pos1

Intelligent and well thoughtout (and some would hope "final thought") on the whole Imus-Rutgers-Ho’s issue. Did somebody say "ho’s"? Let’s go to the strip club and make it rain!!

http://newsbloggers.aol.com/2007/04/17/cho-seung-huis-plays/

Some cat that works for AOL was in a playwrighting class with the (alleged) school shooter and posted his plays online. While the violent imagery and theme of pedophelia and absence of a father figure were all striking for the raw way in which they were presented, I personally was appalled by this sentence of dialogue: "Come on, John. Sit down. We need to have [SIC] man-to-man talk." This kid was supposed to be an English major? WARNING SIGNS. Plus I would have thrown a "no homo" after man-to-man. But clearly I possess amazing writing skills. Plus it’s just reeeeealy hard to buy a handgun in NYC. What were we talking about again?

http://www.withleather.com/post.phtml?pk=2644

In other news about Asian people doing big (albeit more positive) things in America -here is a write up about the Red Sox Dice-K’s last outing. Along with a picture that made MY morning more enjoyable.

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/04/17/world/asia/17manners.html?em&ex=1176955200&en=d9b58e74515ea703&ei=5087%0A

In International news about Asia -China is trying to take steps to ban spitting in Beijing (sp?) before the 2008 Olympics. Me, I’m just glad I’ve never been to the "anus hospital."

1.		I Cant Feel My Face	14-3-3	.775	-	5-3-2	12	10
2.		Unanimous Decision	13-4-3	.725	1	6-2-2	13	4
3.		team bird	10-7-3	.575	4	4-5-1	8	11
4.		Big D Ballers	11-9-0	.550	4.5	7-3-0	7	5
5.		Sadr City Yankees	9-7-4	.550	4.5	6-2-2	2	2
6.		Got It Cheaper	9-9-2	.500	5.5	3-5-2	9	8
7.		The Flushing Toilets	9-9-2	.500	5.5	4-6-0	10	6
8.		Please Dont Touch	8-10-2	.450	6.5	6-4-0	14	6
9.		IMNOTCHINESE	9-11-0	.450	6.5	4-6-0	4	9
10.		Jack Bauer	8-11-1	.425	7	6-4-0	6	7
11.		Carcetti	7-10-3	.425	7	2-6-2	1	1
12.		The Baghdad Bombers	8-12-0	.400	7.5	3-7-0	11	14
13.		Whatchu’ Know	6-11-3	.375	8	2-6-2	3	2
14.		The Jihadists	5-13-2	.300	9.5	5-4-1	5	4

As you can CLEARLY see from the standings posted above, my fantasy baseball team (I CAN’T FEEL MY FACE) is off to a hot start. Assuming I continue to do well, I’ll keep you updated. Because if i know anything I know that people who aren’t in my league LOVE to hear about my team and how amazing it is. If AJ Burnett and/or Brett Myers gets their shit together it’s a wrap. GOT ‘EM!

So since I found those Cam’ron diary entries online I’ve been more motivated (remotivated?) to post on my blog. As ya prolly know by now, some dude shot and killed like 32 people on the VTech campus. Shockingly, neither Michael or Marcus Vick was anywhere near the scene of the crime (did Marcus Vick even go to VTech?) and the shooter was actually some cat named Cho Seung-Hui from South Korea.

Seriously folks, I thought South Korea was the cool one. Y’all know about them giant rabbits they eat in North Korea…bugged son. Bugged.

In the wake of the largest "rampage" shooting in American history, I feel compelled to quote a passage I authored in these very same digital pages after the Amish kids shot up their quaint little one-room schoothouse: 

Why exactly are kids shooting up schools?

I don’t know, but when they start shooting up public transportation, then I’ll put on my thinking cap and go to work on the problem. The moral of the story is, if you don’t want to get shot, you probably shouldn’t go to school. Or Iraq.

The Truant Officer > Harris and Klebold.

Some people will be quick to blame our countries "bucka-bucka-BLAU!" policy on guns (I remember reading that the shooter had a receipt for the Glock 9mm in his backpack…wait….he did this shit with a fucking handgun?? who was working security on this campus, the Iraqi police??) not to mention, rap music, immigration, Guiliani and video games -but I blame our educational system.

I don’t plan on justifying myself though.

    Yo. so through no real fault of my own i caught a couple of minutes of this nonsense retard shit. It’s the worst. Next time you talk to a girl who is too dumb for words, blame shows like these. Fucking sickening. Hows that for coherent thought?

Why aren’t the Yankees scoring runs? What’s going on with A-Rod? Shit is pretty nuts, and one can’t help but wonder if the chorus of naysaying shoulddies….I’m just gonna stop that thought right there and rest on the amazing writing that brings through phrases like "nay-saying shoulddies." Kids -this is writing.

It’s fucking raining. It always rains. Grow up. Weather channel my cocknballs.

Best Wingers Express is the shit. If you are in or around Murray Hill it would be in your best interest to visit this spot. The Chicken (capitalized to show reverence) is very good. From a taste perspective. Don’t be stupid, stupid. Get up on it.

My BEEEEEERFDAAAAAAY: MAY 11TH pussycat lounge…. downtown… feat: flim flam bmore fam n lu……..rreals. Thats wasssup..

Feel me?

Remember "Shake it fast" or "Shake your ass" that Mystikal song. Where it goes "been so looo-oooong."

Yeah, Mystikal got locked for raping his haridresser.

Here are some funny images. For your viewing pleasure.

I have a lot more to say, so find me and talk to me.

www.chronikill.com www.myspace.com/chronikill -new shows and naked celebrities.

Yo.

I know I havent posted in a minute so, merry christmas and happy new years. I been chilling, literally. it’s mad cold. And the cold weather is a sure sign that you will be sharing a train car with a crazed homeless person next time you use public transportation to get home from your night time activity of choice.

Last night, while picking up some $$$ the booking agency owed me from the show we KILLED at Southpaw last week (thanks if you came through, new album out Labor Day, assuming labor day is in the fall) I was confronted by an aparently homeless lunatic on the west side near the deuce (thats 42nd street for all you clowns). He was standing in the middle of the sidewalk screaming to no one in particular that we were (people) "created in gods image, but we are not god." Occasionally he would interject "you feel me" or "see what I’m saying." I guess even crazy people realize the effectiveness of urban slang on young people.

So theres that. My heart really goes out to homeless people in the winter. Then again, I guess when you are homeless the summer isn’t filled with baseball games and outdoor drinking  beaches.

I still plan to take my blogging game to the next level and get off Friendster and onto some realer forum, but barring that happening in the near future, I’ll try and drop my trademark brand of intelligent knowledge on your collective heads a bit more frequently. I’ll also try and post a paper I wrote in college about why New Orleans (central city albeit) is such a shithole. Mind you I wrote this paper pre-Katrina. Trying and doing aren’t the same thing, mind you.

Oh, shout out the Saints for a great season. I’m rooting for the Bears in the Super Bowl, because I like the Bears more than the Colts. I’m logical like that.

I had a lot of other things to say, by instead Im going to smoke a cigarette.

-james

….and the unseasonable warmth shall soothe your soul, son.

Hey y’all. Sorry, I was just talking to a patient.

Y’all ever do that shit?

Sometimes when someone is calling me, I’ll deliberately be in the middle of saying some provocative shit like "..and she broke the glass over your head just like that?? On the plane??….Hello, James speaking." It’s pretty funny the depths we (I) will sink to in our (my) never ending quest to amuse ourselves.

Rolling down the river, if I may…

Thanks to all the heads who rolled through on Saturday night to Desmond’s Tavern and packed the place. I really appreciate the support and you guys came out and supported. We are collectively thankful for having good friends and/or fans who appreciate what we do -really, thank you guys. While that was the last show of 2006 (barring unforeseen fame), please stay tuned for more info on us playing bigger and better venues in 2007 (wow that feels scary to write). Like somewhere in between Satelite and MSG.

Also, we are hard at work on our new album (possible titles include "Yeah, Nah", "….And Now This?" and "Number 2.") due out on July 4th. We should have a video for the lead single "Drinking On A Tuesday" at least a couple of months in advance of that though. It should be quite labor-intensive and serious in the Chronikill studio over the next few months. On the other hand, sometimes we just get reeeeeeeeealy high and record ourselves making silly noises.

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As the holiday season approaches, I’ve been bombarded with a number of commercials for Kay (Kaye?) Jewelers who remind us that "every kiss begins with kay (kaye?)." Nice sentiment.

Don’t mind me for founding Bee Jewelers and using the slogan "every blowjob begins with bee."

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In the wake of the tragic shooting of a 23-yr old groom to be in Queens, isn’t it refreshing that the Benetton-esque ethnic composition of the offending officers may, for once, allow all citizens who see their rights trampled by our cities killer cops on a daily basis to band together under the same umbrella. Usually the larger issues at hand (the haves vs. the have-nots, the prison industrial complex, mandatory minimums, I could fucking go on and on and on) are lost as the public foolishly falls into the tired white/black argument instead of focusing on trying to make a change. Unified against the police, we have the power to demand a change to the "blue wall of silence" culture that has existed for too long in the NYPD. Divided we have a bunch of confused angry people sharing anecdotal evidence.

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I’mma be in Philadelphia for at least part of this weekend, attending this boxing match with a couple of the homies. I wrote a scathing expose on Philadelphia roughly 15 months ago and I’m sure (in the tradition of my observations being both absolute and timeless) it is still accurate. My plan is to make a huge drunken fuss of myself with Yard Ale and then eat mad cheese steaks.

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I recently read "Animal Farm." I don’t know why I hadn’t read it before, but it was real good. Like you would expect a classic to be. How is that for descriptive. I tried to reread 1984, and it annoyed the hell out of me, however I found Animal Farm to be refreshing in it’s simple "quick read" nature. My only complaint is that I find it unrealistic that animals can talk to each other.

I’m almost done with "On The Road" another classic that I never read for reasons unknown. I enjoying that book as well, although I have a couple of issues with the dialog and slang of the day. If I was there, those kids would have stepped up their talking game big time. It was also amusing to read that famous quote about hanging out with mad people and roman candles and whatnot. Half the people that would like to think that quote has some deep relevance to their unique outlook on life are the types who have never even broke night and are probably shook to go out past 8 on a week night. I’m just saying, the term "mad" is mad relative, I suppose.

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There were a couple of other things I wanted to mention, but my memory fails me. Have an issue you want me to write about, holler at me in the comments. Hope all is well with you kiddies, I’ll catch you in the streets.